I haven't yet handed in my resignation letter, so I'm just going to mumble a little when I talk about this. I got a new job.
Since I haven't yet handed in that letter, it still seems a little... nebulous. I need to do some traveling in the very beginning, and tonight I ordered my plane tickets (thanks to Kara's credit card and my excellent ability to type and spend other peoples' money). When my new boss outlined my upcoming travel, I was practically giddy with the thought of a new credit card, until he explained that all my travel would be reimbursed within a few days. Whothewhattheheh?
Seriously. What part of "single mother" is the rest of the world not getting? The Kid's camp bill is due any second now, and as soon as I pay it, our carriage will turn back into a pumpkin and we'll be on a streetcorner, selling matchsticks for a shilling and speaking with Cockney accents. Toasted cat for breakfast, toasted cat for lunch, toasted cat for dinner.
Although the small circle of people that I've whispered to about the new job (well, them, ...and the Internet) have been truly excited for me, everyone immediately recoils, gasps, and asks what I'm going to do with the Kid while I'm traveling.
I'm going to tie a feedbag around her neck and teach her how to drink out of the toilet. Or, I'll send her to my parents, where they will carry her around on a velvet pillow and spit her food into her mouth like a baby bird. It's a toss-up. Will I miss her? Yes. Have I had a day off since October, 2004? No. I will bring a photo. I will call her. I will also float in the pool endlessly, and sleep until 9.
And I will enjoy it.
4 comments:
And you should.
Make sure that pool boy keeps you supplied in fresh and fruity cool drinks -- all while gently creating a gentle breeze with a palm!!! Kiss the kiddo and get on the plane:)
I like the way Stephanie thinks!
Oh, can you hide me in your luggage somehow?
I still think you should have taken the sex-phone operator job.
Post a Comment